Okay so it's been a while since I posted anything here, but I feel like blogging tonight! Sometimes you get a hankering for chicken, sometimes to hear a certain song, sometimes to go out and do something crazy like going to the mall on Christmas Eve. But tonight I've got a hankerin' for writing, well okay, typing. We officially got our first foster children on Veteran's Day 2011. For those of you not aware of the date, that would be November 11. I can't really put any details in here about them, so I won't. But what I do want to share is that just like anything in life, the first time always seems to be the hardest, or if not the hardest it just feels strange until you get used to it.
The first day was like cotton candy. It was really easy, very fluffy, and kind of sweet. Actually I would go so far as to say the first couple of days were like this. Then came the myriad of appointments. There's doctors, social workers, family members of the children, and numerous other specialists and counselors that the children need to be seen by to make sure they are okay. But don't let that discourage you if you're considering foster care or adoption. I wouldn't trade one minute of any of it. Once you start feeling that connection with the kids you know it's all worth it. The first time they actually cry because you're leaving them with a daycare breaks your heart and makes you feel loved at the same time.
Along the way there are plenty of ups and downs. We're learning how to deal with "the terrible twos" as well as other issues due to what at least one child witnessed before coming into foster care. It's a great feeling though when you see that child take comfort just from your presence after a nightmare. Immediately the screaming stops, and soon the light snoring begins. Hopefully for the rest of the night until morning, but not usually likely. Sometimes we've had to get up and give comfort several times a night. But it's getting better.
It's weird because you feel like a parent and not like a parent at the same time. These kids are with you 24/7 besides whatever time is allotted for family visits. But the really weird part is you can schedule doctor appointments without asking anyone, but if you want to get a haircut for a child you have to get permission from their parents or family.
I've had some experience in the past raising children, but that was quite a while ago and it wasn't 24/7. I changed diapers, fed and burped, and occasionally babysat overnight my goddaughter whom I won't name here since she's in college and it would embarrass her probably that I mentioned changing her diaper, but that's not even close to the level of commitment it takes to be a parent. There's always that awkward moment when making appointments too. You call the doctor and say "I need to make an appointment for my foster child". It just feels weird. You want to say my child, but then you know if you do that the next awkward moment will be when they ask for the child's name and you have to say their last name and then they ask for your name and then of course they notice the last name's not the same. Wow that was a mouthful, hopefully that made sense. It's getting late and I'm getting tired.
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